Happy Breakfast

This morning I went downstairs to look for something to eat. I was probably going to have the same ole cereal, but then I saw that there were Chocolate Lover's donuts on the counter. I very audibly said "yay". Then I noticed that the ones with chocolate crumbles were gone and I said "awe". Wait I didn't get close enough. There was one left "yay". But yesterday I noticed we did't have any milk. "Awe." I opened the fridge and guess what? There were two gallons of milk. "Yay." I actually went through moments of being excited and then dissapointed. I think I might be turning into Homer Simpson. Hell, I did have donuts this morning.

That's just disturbing

I came home today and heard one of the most disturbing sounds. I didn't realize it, but our neighbors have one of those bug lights and every other second one of them was getting zapped. It gives off just a hideous glow. I guess I could understand that people want the bugs to fly somewhere else other than their face but come on! If you're not outside there really is no reason to have it on. You alone are not going to kill off every single bug in the world so just stop trying.

Damn Jingles

The word jingle is catchy. It's a really fun word to say. Just say it out loud. *JINGLE* A couple of days ago I had to call the Kars 4 Kids number to see why it was taking so long for them to get back to me. It initially said on the website that they would call in 24-48 hours. So I got their automated message and then it put me on hold. This is where it gets good. They had this little song sung by a little kid, I could sing the whole damn thing. "Call 1 877 Kars4Kids. That's K-A-R-S Kars4Kids. Call 1 877 Kars4Kids donate your car today." Then it switched to a guy that initially sounded like a clown and he sang the whole thing. I was singing along after the first time and now I just can't get it out of my head. I really didn't need to hear the jingle because I was already donating my car AND I had their number. So, honestly, what was the point of that jingle being on their phone service. It apparently was there to force me to want to donate my new car, because helping people feels good. But what about me? Where's my Come Uppance???
No, honestly, it does make me feel good to donate something. I reccomend calling the number just to hear the jingle. You know the number "Call 1 877 Kars4Kids. That's K-A-R-S Kars4Kids. Call 1 877 Kars4Kids donate your car today." (I know there are two many letters in 'Kars4Kids'...just don't dial the "D" and "S". It confused me at first)

I'm just tired

I was going to write a blog on a new topic today but got side tracked by Lisa's comment about being tired. Why is it, that after being off of work for a couple of days in a row, a person is more tired than they were before being off? Maybe because all they have to look forward to is a never ending cycle of work days in a row. That's what I'm facing right now. I was off of work for four days. Granted I was probably home for a total of ten hours, and I spent those sleeping. Now I have to work six days in a row. I know six doesn't seem like a lot. I already have two of them behind me but it seems like forever until my next day off. Maybe because it's only one day. What can you get accomplished in one day? I'll probably end up sleeping until noon, have a huge lunch that consists of leftovers, take a nap, watch a movie, go online and then go to bed. Man I'm so old. Right now, I feel like someone put me in a huge blender and set it to puree. Perhaps this is a phase of getting older. Aren't we supposed to improve with age? I sure as hell don't agree with that.

Playing Catch-Up

I was going to post a new blog...on something stupid I'm sure. Then I got to thinking, what's my problem, I already posted two blogs today. For some reason I feel like I need to catch up. I didn't post a new blog in a few days because I've been busy and of course some people have complained about not seeing a new one up. Whatever people! you'll probably just read this one and be like...oh, she posted two other ones? Where's your blogs? Huh???
Oh, I'm only kidding I really like posting blogs and venting about stupid shit. It just funny how in life we constantly feel like we're behind and need to catch up. If we don't get enough sleep, we try to get more the next night. It's not like there's a sleep meter that counts the amount of hours we sleep for the entire year. We're not going to be penalized for sleeping to little or too much. Although it would be cool if we got paid for those hours of sleep we missed. Maybe someone with a lot of money will make up a pogram like that. Better yet, they should pay us for sleeping. Someone needs to get on that pronto.

Two cars...one driver.

Here is a picture of my new car and my old car. Old Blue is making a face at the new car. I think she new I was replacing her. After I left the dealership on Monday I was listing off all of the little perks my new car. (Other than the fact that it won't just fall apart when traveling down the road.)
1. The exterior of the car looks 1000 times nice than the old one, you can see that the front isn't smashed in. Also, it isn't rusting.
2. I actually have a working left turn signal, no more clicking it on and off to pretend like it works.
3. My left headlight doesn't point up.
4. The air conditioner works without over-heating the car
5. I can adjust my seat, in Old Blue the seats were electric and must have shorted because I was stuck where it was at
6. I have a cd player and tape player. Now I can listen to all the mix tapes I made AND cds.
7. My electric locks work
8. The car isn't full of shit left over from the two previous owners. (Things I found in the old car: taps for shoes, an old lock and key, two pairs of grandma mittens, my sister's name plate from work, and numerous recipts and garbage from the past three years I drove it)
9. It has that new car smell
10. I have a cup holder that isn't jimmied in the console

This list continues. I just don't want to bore you with all the detail. Wait! Yes I do!!! MMMWWWAAAAA!!!!!

Coche Nuevo

As many of you know I have finally said good bye to my old car. This is my new car. It's a 2004, Saturn LX 300. I bought it at a Honda dealership of all places. Those blasted Hondas have a such a great resale value that I couldn't afford to get one. I have yet to get a name for it. If you have any suggestions, let me know. It's so awesome having a car that doesn't make me nervous everytime I get behind the wheel. Of course I will be paying for it until I die. EH!! It's a small price to pay for my personal safety.

Moody Blue

My car, as we all know, has serious issues. I think the car actually knows when I get paid. It seems act act up then. It's like a needy person, "why don't you ever spend any money on me?" I bought it a new air freshener last week, is that not enough? What about the $3.00 per gallon gas that I have to put in it every three to fours days? Have you forgotten about those things car? Or did they just slip your mind? You EXPECT me to do these things, don't you? Well you know what? I'm done with you! That's right, I've had it! There are plenty of younger, faster cars with no rust out there. You were given your last chance in June. We had two good months and now you pull shit like this! Uh uh! I'm not putting up with it! I'm tired of your little games. Here it goes, I'm going to say it...I think we should separate. I'm going to have a nice strong tow truck come and pick you up. That's the end of us. I never want to see you again!!!

Honk if you like money

I always pass a billboard for Discover Card that says "Honk if you like money". Well, I like money but I'm torn about honking. You see, if I honk and then the person in front of me might think I'm honking at them. This in turn will make them slow down or drive like an asshole. If I don't honk, am I denying that I like money? I wonder if there is a special prize for the people who are brave enough to honk. Like a bag of money falling out of the sky into the back seat of your car. Or gettting pulled over by a cop that happens to be Ed McMahn. As he gets to your car he hands over one of those bags of money that have the dollar sign on it and says "Hey-Oh". I mean if the consequenes are pissing someone off that I was probably never see again, or winning a bag of money, shit what do I have to lose!

Might as well face it, I'm addicted to Glade

I was on my weekly trip to Target and I realized that I happen to look at the same exact sections of the store. The last time I was there I was supposed to get a new pair of sunglasses but forgot them because they aren't in my usual sections. Everytime I go to the store I have to look through the cds and movies, the picture frames and albums, the dollar spot, and for some odd reason the air fresheners. I think I have a slight addiction to glade air freshener candles. Sometimes I'm lucky enough to leave the store without buying one but not today. I got home and wanted to burn the candle but then realized I should burn the other two I have first. I have to find a way to remind myself that I don't need another candle despite the fact that they smell so wonderful. Anyone have a suggestion?

I Flied? No You Falled!

If you haven't gueesed it, today blog is about falling. I was at work today and I had to train a new employee. I basically talked though everything I was doing, showed him where everything was, etc. We had to get some ice cream from the freezer and I was of course talking to him. I had no clue that there was ice on the ground. (I missed the yellow caution sign) I totally slipped and fell hard on my ass. It was one of those falls that happened in slow motion. I slipped, saw my hands fly up in the air, then came my left leg and I was down for the count. It could have been much worse, I could have hit something other than my ass on the way down. It is so embarassing to fall right in front of the new guy. So much for those damned non-slip shoes I have to wear. Don't get me wrong I've fallen a lot of times but when no one was around. It doesn't seem to matter that much when no one sees it. It the opposite of what kids do. When we were little and we fell, if someone saw it we would cry but if no one caught it we would just get back up again. Now when we fall, we get up as quickly as we can and pretend like we're ok, only to find out later that our entire body hurts and we contemplate calling in to work the next day. I know that if I was that guy, I wouldn't be able to wait to get home to tell people that I saw a jackass wipe out. Oh well, I guess I'll be the butt of his jokes for a while. A very sore butt might I add.

Hey I want that!

Why is it that when you can have something, you don't really want it, but then when you want something you can't have it. I was in the gas station today and I was going to get some chocolate, like I do practically everyday, but then I thought, "no I don't really need any". I had a chocolate frosted brownie earlier. So, I left the gas station clicking my heels and chocolateless. I got into the car and I'm not kidding you, ten minutes went by and I wanted chocolate. Of course I had none in the car because I eat it the second I buy it and it would have melted...being summer and all. I know how kids feel when they want something and their parents are like "you should have had it when you had the chance." But they didn't want it then, they want it now! It so weird how that stuff happens. Isn't it?

Seat's Taken...Not Really

This really doesn't upset me, I was rather amused by it becuase it has never happened to me before. Perhaps if I was still in school I would have been devastated, but in this post school world I'm living in, it was funny. Ok, you're probably thinking "just write the blog you asshole!" Sorry, I just wanted to put a disclaimer on it so you don't take pity on me. Here it goes:
I just recently got a promotion and started the job yesterday. Some people I work with are a little sour about what happened. The girl whose job I took over was fired on a basis I can't disclaim legally. She was there a long time and well liked. Not that I'm not well liked, it's just that I don't really talk to the people I work with. I just want to set this up. So, I was getting lunch yesterday and I put my plate down at my usual lunch table. I went to grab somthing to drink and sat down. There were a few other people sitting there, that's cool with me. Then this other girl walked in, said something, sat at another table and the two or three people who were sitting with me akwardly moved to the other table. I couldn't tell you what she said because it was in Spanish and said too fast for me to understand. Anyhow, they moved. Then another girl sat there and a minute later moved to another table. One more person sat down, took a glass of water from my pitcher and the second another seat opened she got up and took it. I had an entire table, which could seat 6 people, to myself while the other two tables were full. Now I know what Forrest Gump felt like. Like I said, it was amusing because I don't really care what these people think of me.

Rain Rain Go Away

Having a day off seems to be sort of a vacation for me these days. I've been working like a crazy woman. Ok, so I've been pulling in forty hours or more a week, which is alot for me. I've planned on spending this day off sitting by the pool and getting some sun. I miss getting a good tan every summer. That tradition died out after our yearly camping trips stopped happening. Needless to say I was really excited for today. I actually had plans for my day off. (Plans that didn't involve spending my day in my pjs.) I got up the morning at 11am, bright and early and came upstairs to find that it was all cloudy and RAINING! We have been in the middle of a drought for the summer and it lifted the same day I was off. Why must it rain everytime I'm on vacation? The last two times I was in Florida it rained the whole week. I'm really not lucky enough to have a nice relaxing day off. Maybe the next time I want to get sun, I should go to the desert. But, if I do, it will probably rain and won't really be a desert. Curse my rotten luck!

Cutting someone off...the nice way

I was on my long drive to work this morning and about a half hour into the ride I had the weirdest thing happen. I was sitting at a light and the guy next to me was trying to get my attention. I thought, shit, he's going to tell me that I have a flat tire or that something is falling off of my car...or just ask for directions. I turned down my music and he said "do you mind if I cut you off so I can get around this truck". What? That was probably the nicest thing that has ever happened to me while I was driving. I told him "of course, go right ahead". He got in front of me and gave me a thank you wave. (I always check for a thank you wave. It's just the nice thing to do) This experience just made my day. It's so nice to see that someone out there still has some manners. I totally should have gave him my phone number. Too bad he was like 60.

Step Off

I meant to write this yesterday, but I was too busy watching Major Legue Two. So, here's what's bothering me. I was on my weekly Target run, buying stuff I didn't need and then I realized I needed some more shower gel. I came to the razor aisle and there was a guy studying all of the electric razors. I walked a bit down the aisle and there was a lady standing right in front of where I wanted to look. Ok, fine, she has a right to be there. I looked for my razor refills, found them in two point two seconds. She started to move, so I moved in. There are so many different kinds of shower gel. I thought I'd try I different scent, so yeah I was in the aisle for a couple of minutes but I stood back so if anyone would of wanted something they couild have grabbed it. BUT I was not standing back so the same lady that was in the aisle earlier came and stood right in front of me. I moved a little farther down then aisle and she moved with me. I just wanted to get around her and I couldn't. My only option was to go to the next aisle and around to the front of the ailse I was just in. What is it with some people? They just don't have any common courtesy.

You're loving it, you got it TOYOTA

(The subject title is from Forget Paris, for all of you "uncultured" people)

I am not loving Toyotas. No, I didn't buy one and I don't think I ever will. Not that there's anything wrong with them, it's just that my experience today with Toyotas was not the best. I was driving home from work, in rather good spirits because...well...I was out of work. About ten minutes, into my drive I pulled behind a Toyota Camry at a red light. The light changed and I don't know what the driver was doing but it took them a few seconds to step on the gas. They never fully stepped on the gas because they got up to a whopping 30 mph in a 45 mph zone. I'm not one who can easily fall into road rage but when something delays me from getting right home after work, you better believe I'm going to get pissed. I sped around this jerk doing the speed limit. (Now that is just wrong) I was on my merry little way again. The sun was shining in my eyes, my car was hot, everything was back to normal, until I got saw that the car in front of me was going really slow. I had to step on my brake, which I don't like doing unless I have to come to a stop, and I was stuck behind the Toyota Camry. I did a double take. What what what? How the hell did it get in front of me when I went around it minutes ago. I looked in my review mirror and saw that the Camry I passed before was still behind me. I was surrounded! Surrounded by Jerks! Apparently if you own a Toyota, Camry in specific you have to drive like an asshole. Oh, but not just any asshole. A slow asshole. I think I'll stick to my Buick thank you!

Construction

If there's one thing that can annoy me in the car, it's construction. I have a few things to say about this topic. I know that contruction workers are trying to repair the road and make it better for you and and me, but damn! Do they have to work on every road at the same time? Just about all of the east-west roads on my way to work are under construction at one point or another. We're talking like four roads here people! I've taken a different route this week because I'm house sitting and as of this morning, they started tearing this new road up. There were three different points in my trip where I was delayed by contruction traffic, my favorite being the last one.
I pulled up to an intersection about five minutes before I had to be at work and all the cars in front of me started getting over to the right lane. It wasn't until the soccer mom (I don't use that term lightly, she actually had a soccer sticker in her window) in front of me got over, that I saw those blasted construction cones. As I inched closer and closer, I saw five construcation workers. One was pushing a wheelbarrel thing, one one throwing water or something out of a paint can and the other three were just standing there. Tough work, huh? Three lights later I saw what they were actually doing. The guy pushing the wheelbarrel thing was repainting the cross walk and the paint can lady was throwing white dust on the paint. You're probably thinking, why is Vicki complaining, crosswalks are just two lines? Yeah, no. For some odd reason, this crosswalk has the diagonal lines on it, just in case people couldn't see the two lines. How stupid do they think we are? Honestly! Do we really need crosswalks?
Most people know that they have to stop before the traffic signal so they aren't in the intersection and the pedestrians cross in front of the cars. I know that the common sense level has hit an all new low. So maybe these new dumb people need more lines to see crosswalks. I don't know why the rest of the country has to suffer just because of these dumb people. You'll hear more about my annoyance of people who lack common sense and courtesy in another blog. It's just too long of a subject for me to deal with right now. Why can't construction workers work at night? I've seen them out there with big lights and stuff before. I think it would help ease daytime traffic jams. Just my opinion.

Dressing up

Why is it that, when you dress slightly nicer than the norm, people give you huge compliments? I mean, do I look like shit every other day out of the year? I know that I personally am not the most schnazzy dresser in the world, but I don't think I look that bad. Do I? Maybe I do and people are to polite to tell me I look like ass. I just find it funny that when I do dree up, people are like "wow you look great! Have you lost weight?" "Actually yes I have, just by putting on this outfit, I've dropped 50 pounds."
I guess I should just be happy to recieve a compliment. But I always want to know if these people have ulterior motives. I should just start trusting people when they say I look good. Maybe I do look good. Instead of thanking someone for the compliment, I should just say "I know, don't I look great." That's exactly what I'm going to do. Thanks for the ego boost!

Getting older...

I know that every day that goes by we get another day older. That's a technicality. But sometimes I feel that when certain days pass, I get several years older. The way I'm feeling right now, I'd have to say I'm in my mid-to late seventies. I oughta know what that looks like, I work with old people. To tell you the truth, some of them act younger than I do. They don't seem to complain as much and (at least today) they move faster than me.
In all fairness, I wore a pair of shoes today that are meant to be worn by someone who is planning on sitting for the majority of the day. I stand on my feet for 8+ hours a day. Not a great move on my part. I could have sworn I was going to die from the pain. Ok, not die, that's a little extreme, maybe pass out. Ok, not pass out, but cry. All right, all right, not cry, wimper. Yeah, that's it, wimper. At the end of the day, I hobbled to my car and took these devil shoes off to find two blisters and what appears to be bruises on the balls of my feet. Shoes aren't supposed to do that! Perhaps I should look into filing a lawsuit againt the shoe makers. Or just write a stern letter. They'd probably write back and tell me that if I don't like their shoes I should look into buying something in the orthopedic line. Orthopedics aren't stylish! Well, some easy spirits are nice but as a whole they just don't cut it. I guess I'm bound to wearing uncomfortable shoes in order to stay at the height of fashion. *sigh* Sometimes life just isn't fair.